Let's all take a deep breath. Ready?

OK. Did you take one? Because I seriously think we all need to take one. Yes, Angelina Jolie is pregnant, or as US Weekly calls her, "preggers," with Brad Pitt's baby. Yes, the baby will likely be very good-looking, and yes, it's all very scandalous because Brad left Jen for Angelina and now he is no longer known as Brad, but as one half of Bradgelina (I'm personally more of a fan of the Pittolie moniker, but that's neither here nor there). But can we get some perspective?? Please??

The way some people are talking, you would think this baby was the second coming of Christ. Just because there was some hot peen/vag contact does not mean everybody needs to get their panties in a bunch. Think about poor little Maddox (or Mad, as I like to call him when I come over for our playdate) and Zahara. Do you think they appreciate this fever pitch level of hysteria? Granted, Zahara is, like, two months old and probably doesn't give a crap about anything but eating strained peas and watching Blue's Clues, but I think if she had any semblance of what was going on, she would not be happy. And I'll be honest. I am a little afraid of Maddox. He seriously looks like he could kick my ass. Yes, he's about a fifth of my size, but there's something about that mini-mohawk that gives me the feeling that he would stab me in the face if I tried to mess with Bradgelina. So I'm going to refrain from dwelling too much on this new baby. And I hope you'll join me.