I think most people are familiar with the awesomeness that is Chuck Norris. Karate master and acclaimed actor, he brought to life a character most actors would give a vital organ to play: Walker, Texas Ranger. Yes, The Norris is a force to be reckoned with, a man who could take you down with a single roundhouse kick to the face. Yes, you. I don't care how tough you think you are--The Norris is tougher.

You can read about his awesome-ocity here

OK, so we've established that The Norris is awesome, right? Here's the problem: my two co-workers are obsessed with him. They happened upon the above list last week, and now The Norris factors into just about every conversation they have. A dramatization:

E: Hey, did you see that thing in the paper about that woman who got killed and robbed in Evanston?
Z: Yeah, that was crazy.
E: Man, if Norris was there, he would have just roundhouse kicked the guy who did it in the face, and it would have been over.
Z: Yeah he would have! Norris would have messed that guy up!!

Don't get me wrong--these guys are great, and I consider them my friends. But it's getting a little out of control. They are talking about buying and wearing these and putting these
up in their cubicles. I'm assuming they're being ironic about it, but the level of Norris Worship has reached an all-time high. Z has taken to making up his own "facts" about The Norris; he just sent this to me:

when the CIA was first created in 1947 by president truman, it was originally called CHUCK. it consisted of only one man, chuck norris, who dealt out justice around the world. future presidents, however, deemed this unfair and thought it would create such an unbalanced political and military climate that norris had to become a texas ranger and serve up roundhouse kicks on his own time.

Now before you start thinking, "Oh, she's just got Norris Envy. She's jealous that they're paying more attention to The Norris than they are to her," let me stop you. It's not that I don't love The Norris--I am a firm believer in Chuck's Code of Ethics.

It's just that I think that if things continue in this manner, I might have to stage an intervention. In the form of roundhouse kicks to the face.